sitting, thinking, crying

been having a good day so far, surfing the inter-net and annoying my friends on facebook with loads of random but interesting post's.. suddenly hit with that longing to hear my phone ring and to hear Hayley say " Only me, just thought I'd ring you as the shop is quiet" sobbing my heart out now!!! jeez why do you have to ever love someone so much that to lose them makes you feel this wretched!!
All around me I have good, strong loyal friends but the only one I really need is never going to be here again.... I know this is just me feeling sorry for myself but how do you come to terms with the loss of the greatest friend you could ever wish for??